Michael Feger's Website Design Portfolio and Personal Blog

A Pun is a phrase that deliberately exploits confusion between similar-sounding words for humorous or rhetorical effect. A pun is the lowest form of humour. Why should I suffer alone?

• The roundest knight at king Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference.
• I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
• She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
• A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
• The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
• Now matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.
• A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
• A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France

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(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.… More Information...

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I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over.
Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. More Information...

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The next time you hear a politician use the word ‘billion’ in a casual manner, think about whether you want the ‘politicians’ spending YOUR tax money.

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of it’s releases.

1. A billion seconds ago it was 1959.
2. A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive.
3. A billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age.
4. A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet.
5. A billion dollars ago was only 8 hours and 20 minutes, at the rate our government is spending it.

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